Dumb things they teach you while you “learn” how to manifest.

I don’t believe anyone should be teaching anyone else “how to manifest.” I could feel the collective money mindset coaching industry gasp and clutch its pearls, as I typed that 😂

I didn’t know manifesting was even a thing until like 2 years ago. They don’t teach that sort of thing in small towns in south Georgia or at major universities. And would you believe that even earning an MBA wasn’t an appropriate avenue to lead me towards personal growth and spiritual enlightenment.

The first time I heard the magical buzzword *manifest,* I was intrigued. Suddenly, my newsfeed was filled to the brim with money manifesting coaches. There were women (and dudes) out there who could teach me how to create my dream life/life I’m obsessed with/life I didn’t need a vacation from/laptop lifestyle/etc?! Sweet! I’m in. Here, take my money.

I poured over all the posts. I bought all the books. I listened to hours and hours of FB lives. I bought oils and crystals. I balanced my chakras. I journaled. I did all the things. Who knew a girl had to buy so much stuff and do so many things in order to be a manifesting pro?!

Yeah, turns out you don’t. But I certainly spent a bunch of money I didn’t have on a bunch of things I didn’t need. So there’s that…

In an effort to help you learn from my experiences, I’ve made a list of some of the nuggets of wisdom I learned from all of the many books, videos, and experts who taught me how to manifest like a boss. (All of this is written in jest, so lighten up. Oh, and I totally wrote one of those manifesting books, and you definitely need to check it out –> here.)

#1 Never, ever, under any circumstances, say the words “I Can’t Afford That.”

Instead, buy all the things because then you’ll be giving off the vibe that you’re abundant af, and a trillion dollars will magically show up in your checking account within 3 business days.

#2 Don’t use coupons. What are you going to do? Save a quarter on a can of green beans? Ugh, so much lack mindset!

Nah, girl. Imma keep using my coupons, but thanks. This was really annoying advice, which earned it a spot on this list.

#3 You MUST be high vibe all the time! ALL THE TIME, got it? Otherwise your toxic negativity will repel all the money and send it running in the other direction.

Barf. There’s nothing like suppressing your emotions to keep you from healing anything. Ever.

#4 Never use the word “want” because it implies the lack of whatever it is you want.

Instead, when asked what you’d like for supper, say something like “I am open to receiving a chicken quesadilla.” Or if someone asks you how you’d like to spend the afternoon, an acceptable response might be, “I am currently manifesting a trip to Whole Foods and maybe a matinee.”

#5 You have to feel what it will feel like to already have whatever it is you want are manifesting.

How the f*ck am I supposed to feel like I’m on a yacht in the Caribbean when I’m sitting in my driveway, swatting gnats and sweating in places that have no business sweating?! 🤣 #glamerous

I could seriously go on and on, but I’ll stop with that last gem.

The point of this post is not to be snarky. It’s to point out that it’s important not to overthink everything. It’s to remind you that you can’t take everything you hear or see on the internet as YOUR truth. I’m sure that the things on this list probably do help some people, but that doesn’t mean they will “work” for you or me or Sally down the street.

In all seriousness, just find what feels good to you, then manifest the shit outta whatever you want, yall!